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5 Essential Steps of Picking Up a Woman

Until a few years ago, I used to visit a regular circle of friends almost every Saturday. They were men in their twenties or older. Most of them were single and we would meet to discuss how our week was.

What struck me was that most of them had a fairly negative outspoken opinion about women. Expired dates were discussed in detail and every time it was screeching and roaring about what we had experienced.

Nobody was actually serious. Whether this was due to immaturity or just a fear of hooking up on women, I’ll leave that open. But there was also a deeper reason that I went to my group of friends every Saturday. I was so reminding myself that I didn’t want to end up like them.

These friends would spend most of their time talking about how women are bad. To me, according to my opinion is that these friends were actually missing one important thing…that is picking up right women for themselves.

So in this article today, I will explain how you can pick up a woman on the street, during a night out, within your social network, through online dating or for a long-term relationship.

Essential steps of picking up women.


These are questions you will need to ask yourself in order to understand how to pick up women.

1. How Do You Pick Up a Woman You Already Know?

Have you ever considered that you can also pick up women in your direct social network? Men are often unaware of it, but your attractive colleague, your sister’s handsome girlfriend, or that single neighbour two doors away can also be seduced.

Picking up women you already know requires a different approach and it has its pros and cons.

Some important benefits are:

  • Social Proof

If a woman sees that you are respected by her social network (especially the people she admires), she is more likely to accept you. She will assume that you have to be a nice/good guy because otherwise people – whom she admires so much – wouldn’t want to hang out with you.

  • Pre-selection

You are in the same social network and therefore have to be reliable/okay. Women look at others to judge you. With this, you have already passed the first ‘line of defense’.

  • No bitch shield

You are known to her. She will be less likely to reject you and take a lot more things from you. For example, an unknown man who suddenly picks her up can expect a slap in the face, you can easily get away with that.

Possible drawbacks are:

  • Reputation

It is important that you know what you are doing. Picking up famous women by creating false expectations can cause arguments within your social network. Discretion and trust are therefore important in this.

  • Friendzone

Chances are the women who are in your social network have come to see you as a friendly acquaintance. You are the last person she will expect to have sexual advances from if you have never flirted with her.

4 Tips to Help You Pick Up Women You Already Know:

a) Wait for your chances 

Take it slow: picking up women within your social network is a long-term game. There will always be a situation where you can hit on a woman. Create situations where you are alone with her (think of a birthday that goes on until the late hours).

Come across as a confident, positive and humorous man. Get women to see and flirt with your attractive features.

b) Know your social network

Pay attention to the mutual relationship. Don’t risk a close friend’s relationship by cheating on their girlfriend. Watch the women who are single. Are they open to sexual contact? Do they flirt with you? Watch for green signals.

c) Work on your reputation

The best chance of getting on the radar of women is by showing attractive behavior. Make sure you become popular within your social network. Not only in women but also in men. Social status is extremely important. So make sure that you are well placed in the group.

d) Isolate

As said before, discretion and trust are extremely important. Don’t tell your group that you slept with their friend. It will damage her reputation. Single hot women will think twice about going to bed with you.

In addition, no woman with self-respect will respond to your sexual advances in front of her girlfriends and friends.

If it happens that you notice that she is open to sexual contact, you communicate that this remains your secret and that it is none of the other people’s business regarding on what you do.

Make sure you give her an excuse to go with you to some other places or just find a place where you two are alone.

2. How do you pick up a woman on the street?

Why on earth would you want to pick up women on the street? Well because it works damn well! How often do you see an attractive woman walking down the street and you think to yourself `wow what a hot thing!`.

Next time, how about talking to her instead of just saying a naughty thought?

You may never have thought about it, but all those single women in your town who roam the shopping streets during the day are the same women who want to kiss and dance with you on the weekend (and much more;).

5 Reasons Why You Want to Start Picking Up Women During the Day: 

  • You work on your fear of approach (out of the comfort zone )
  • You learn to become good at establishing and having conversations with women
  • You surprise women in a positive sense because they don’t experience it often (no competition)
  • You overwhelm women, which makes them less likely to increase their `bitch shield`
  • You can do it at any time of the day and you are not bound by a place or time.

Picking up women during the day is something every man can learn. You can quickly get better at day gaming by taking the following into account:

a) Be spontaneous and live in the moment. 

With day gaming you are not bound to a fixed place. Actually, you could address a woman anywhere. Make use of this spontaneity. As soon as you see a nice woman, walk up to it, grab her attention and say something that comes to mind.

Don’t worry about what other people think. Flirting with women during the day is simply exciting. If you haven’t done it for a while, you will notice that the adrenaline rushes through your body. You feel uncomfortable and make up countless excuses not to have to.

“Besides, what would all those people think of me?”. Everyone experiences these kinds of irrational thoughts. But most people walking down the street don’t think anything at all. Everyone is busy with themselves.

Always respond playfully and flirtatiously: when addressing a woman on the street, it is important that you smile and communicate open body language. No woman on the street is waiting for a creep with malicious intent.

Open her up with something like “Hey! May I tell you something…and don’t worry, I’m not going to sell you a subscription. And then you tell her that she has a nice appearance, etc.

3. How Do You Pick Up a Woman for a One Night Stand?

How do you pick up a woman on the same night? 

We all feel like it sometimes…meeting a woman on a date and going to your bedroom the same evening for a wild night. 

Nightlife gives you a huge number of opportunities to meet attractive single women. Women in nightclubs and cafes are often open to male contact. Why else would they spend hours doing their makeup and looking so attractive?

In order to pick up women while going out, it is important to consider the following factors:

a) Don’t go to town too early

It is very unlikely that women will be open to a sexual adventure at the beginning of the evening. People need some time to shake off the hectic workday. They feel a bit uncomfortable for the first few hours. The afternoon is a good time to visit the catering industry because most of them are busy partying.

b) Self-entertainment

Do not let the environment negatively affect your mood. It can be a bit uncomfortable when you just enter a pub and people immediately bump into you.

Focus on having fun with friends. Having a drink often works to get rid of the first nerves. Having a drink can make you gain the confidence to start a conversation. And also it makes women look much prettier. 

c) Approaching a woman

The later the darks get, the more tipsy people will be. The night is nearing its end and many women are open to male contact.

Women are taken into an emotional moment when the night continues to its end. So at this time, you may talk to her and show your intentions. What you say to her is not that important as long as you are leading and dominant.

Please note this:

  • As soon as you speak to her, look her deep in the eye
  • Keep your voice low when speaking to her.
  • Be physical from the moment you start talking to her.
  • Take a step back as if there’s nothing wrong with a rejection

When it clicks you will notice it soon enough. As soon as a woman finds you interesting, she will be interested in you more.

Not only will she ask you questions, but she will also show non-verbal interest (enlarged pupils, high voice, looking carefully, touching, etc.)

4. How Do You Pick Up a Woman Online?

The arrival of popular dating apps such as Tinder and Badoo brings many possibilities. The dating apps are designed to get in touch with attractive ladies quickly. And that is a favorable development for the guys who are yet to get girlfriends. After all, you can cast a fishing rod from your lazy desk chair to see if there are any female interested parties.

Dating women online is also a safe way of communicating as you have all the peace and time to brainstorm about your messages. In order to pick up women online, it is of course important to know which sites and dating apps are popular today.

When it comes to dating online, first of all, your online dating profile must be in order. This is your business card and where it all starts.

Have you uploaded unclear photos or not written a word on your profile? Then the chance that you will get a response from any woman is much smaller. So it is a must to update your profile.

Sending messages is another important part where many men with online dating go wrong.

Do not endlessly chat with her before she agrees to come to a date. Your goal is to interest her in such a way that she is open to a date.

It is important that you invest some time online to generate trust and appeal in her. However, there is a side note to this.

If you overdo it and get carried away in the enthusiasm of your female match, it can turn against you like a boomerang. It may then happen that she loses interest in you.

Curiosity can give way to predictability and boredom.

You have played all your cards and nothing more interesting to say. Eventually she cuts off contact and you still don’t have a date with her.

5. How Do You Pick Up a Woman For a Relationship?

To be fair, if you’ve had a one-night stand that doesn’t mean she’s your girlfriend right away. But sex is important to get her as a friend.

How do you make her eventually become your girlfriend? What things are important in picking up a woman for a relationship?

To begin with, sex is an important part of this process.

“What’s sex got to do with getting into a relationship?”

Sex is the biggest form of investment you can make on a woman and you also make her fall in love with you faster. As a rule of thumb, you could persist in having sex with her within three dates.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that if you haven’t had sex with her on the fourth date, then you can’t get her as a girlfriend. No,  sexual intimacy creates a lot of attraction and the feeling that you have known someone for a long time. It makes it a lot easier to get her crazy about you.

In order to eventually get her as a girlfriend, it must of course not only be about sex. It’s important that you let her qualify and invest after sex.

You can do the following things together:

  • Let her cook for you
  • Go out together (walking dogs, day at the beach, etc.)
  • Introduce her to your friends or family

Also. it is important to think about what you want with her. Decide whether you want her as a free-range or as a friend. If you prefer her for free, it is important that you don’t see her more than once a week. Otherwise, you can create wrong expectations.

Make sure you also keep your own life. Live as casual as possible. Never neglect your close friends or hobbies.

What do you think?

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