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The Science Behind Attraction Between Men and Women

In this world, there are many questions that you would wish to ask. Example of such questions may be like: 

How do you make a woman fall in love? 

How do you create attraction between man and woman?

Have you ever thought about how people fall in love with each other?

The Science Behind Attraction Between Men and Women

The answers to these questions are much simple than you thought. The first thing you need to know is that contrary to what you may think, attraction is not a conscious choice!

It is not that difficult to arouse attraction in a woman. That is, if you know which factors play an important role in generating attraction.

The Science Behind Attraction Between Men & Women

In this article, there are several things that you will know and they include the following:

  1. What prehistoric alpha males and successful female have in common
  2. The 5 attractive qualities you want to have as a man
  3. The greatest threat to the modern man today
  4. 6 Effective Ways to Become More Attractive to Women Unconsciously
  5. What you need to know about attraction between a man and a woman (things are different than you think)
  6. And much, much more.

Women courting in prehistoric times.

You often hear and read that attraction in a woman is mainly about appearance. You will hear people say that in order to attract a woman you will need a certain physical appearance in order for a woman to like you. This is the biggest nonsense out there!

Sure, good looks lend a hand, but that is not the only thing to arouse attraction in a woman. After all, there is something that is much more important to women than height or an amazing head.

I am talking about the primal instincts of man. By primal instinct, I mean the innate urge to do things without having to think about it.

Without these basic instincts, humanity would have long since died out. Women and men share most of the primal instincts with each other (such as the survival instinct), but there are also some important differences.

Attraction is something that works differently in men than in women.

I will elaborate on this later.

Now let’s go back to the primal instincts of a man first. We inherited these instincts from our ancestors who lived thousands of years ago. These instincts include the following:

Hunting and gathering food.

Men are naturally hunters and warriors. We hunt and gather food for our families and the tribe to which we belong.

In the old days, as cavemen, we did this in groups, fighting predators and other hostile tribes to protect our women and children.

The women played an important role in raising the children. They were mainly caring and less competitive.

Sex and reproduction

The hunger for sex will always remain for a healthy man. And that might be a good thing, otherwise, we might have long since died out.

To put it bluntly, we have a constant tendency to spread our seed. When we see a beautiful woman walking on the street, we quickly think `Damn it!, I would like to have her in my bed!`.

That’s because we men are mainly visual. For us, an attractive woman is of great value. An attractive woman is a woman who is healthy and fertile.

Once we find a partner and get her pregnant, our testosterone levels drop for some time.

And that has an important reason …

Because constantly cheating while your partner is pregnant or needs help with a newborn baby could have dangerous consequences.

Because our hormone levels change drastically, we think less about sex and we are mainly engaged in caring. This ensures that we stay with our partner and the newborn baby, especially in the first phase of life.

That way, as a man, we also take care of the offspring and protect our partner against predators and other men.


The greatest threat to the modern man.

However, there is one major threat to the modern man and that is…

Welfare!

In the past, the man was needed to support the family and protect the children. Now a woman with a decent job can also raise her children on her own.

Today it has become much easier to leave your partner when the relationship is not going so well. The number of divorces and broken relationships has never been higher than this in the past fifty years.

Modern man is much more independent and thanks to the internet we have the opportunity to meet thousands of potential partners. The pool from which both men and women can fish has become much larger than it was a hundred years ago.

Monogamy or polygamy?

Did you know that there are more polygamous than monogamous societies worldwide? This is shown by research by evolutionary psychologists.

According to some dating coaches, this is the argument for claiming that humans are not that monogamous by nature.

But that is too easy to say.

Because there are also monogamous cultures that are not Western or Christian. Human beings, like animals, have behavioral patterns that are genetically determined, but the difference is that we have a mind that allows us to direct those drives and emotions.

We humans have our primal instincts, but are able to hold back when we want to cheat.

And besides that, polygamy has one major evolutionary disadvantage:

In cultures where one man is allowed to have multiple wives, it is more difficult for other men to get a wife. In the long run the females run out, which ultimately leads to inbreeding and rare abnormalities.

Attractive traits of a real Apha Man

As a man, how can you increase your attraction to women? I used to have no idea how female psychology worked.

When I finally got through the science behind the attraction between a man and woman, a new world opened up for me. Picking up women turned out not to be as difficult as I always thought!

When it comes to female attraction, there are a number of factors that play an important role. To begin with, all sexually worthy men have one thing in common.

And no… I don’t mean the size of their genitals but value.

All sexually worthy provide value.

Value makes women find you attractive.

Attraction is not something that has been invented recently by dating coaches or seduction sites.

Let’s go back a little bit to the time of our ancestors, the cavemen, which I talked about earlier. 

What was attractive to women thousands of years ago is still so today.

And even though the time of the cavemen is long gone, the mechanisms of attraction have always remained the same.

What characteristics did the troglodytes alpha males have in common that the females found attractive at the time?

Then think properties such as:

  • Dominance
  • Creativity
  • Determination
  • Social intelligence
  • Assertiveness

At the time, it was not the appearance of a man that was looked at, but his behaviour. Good looks were of little value at the time. [Read: 7 characters of Alpha male]

What was far more important to women thousands of years ago was EVERYTHING that increased the chances of survival and reproduction.

And this is programmed into the genes of every woman on Earth, regardless of race, religion, or culture.

From a woman’s perspective, an attractive man is a man who, especially through his behavior and non-verbal body language, shows that he possesses the above qualities.

So it’s not so much about how you look, but how you behave in front of her.

As I wrote before, attraction is not a choice.

For a woman, attraction and falling in love with a man is an emotional response and never a rational choice.

You can define this as ‘raw attractiveness’.

Women therefore live in the emotion of the moment and often only rationalize afterward.

So NEVER let the lack of money or your appearance be an excuse for not being able to hit on women. It is true that you have no influence on the external characteristics inherited from Mother Nature.

But there are plenty of things you can do to arouse the attraction in women.

Six ways to instantly become more attractive to women

OK, now you know the theoretical science behind the attraction between man and woman. Now is the time to put this theory into practice.

Now if you think you should put on a bearskin and drag an attractive woman home by the hair, you are wrong. What I want is for you to sub-communicate the attractive qualities of an alpha man to a woman.

I will give you a number of ways how you can do that in a simple and effective way. [Read: 5 mistakes men make with women]

Assume High Status

Not everyone wants to admit it, but we can’t deny it either. Money and power are important in our society. Or even better, the status you have in our society. You can have everything in order; body height, nice head, etc.

But if you don’t have a penny or if no one respects you, that will be an issue to anyone that you date. Even in the time of the troglodytes there was some form of hierarchy. The oldest or strongest of the tribe was the leader of the group that was allowed to command the rest. And this high status still applies today.

A 2010 study shows that women find men more attractive when they drive an expensive car. Men were depicted in a photo with a Bentley Continental (for the car layman; an expensive car) and a Ford Fiesta.

The men who sat in a Bentley Continental were seen by the female test subjects as the most attractive men. 

Women assign more power to men of high status. It has to do with social status and prestige that women find attractive in a man. It is this high status that makes you stand out to her faster than others. The fact that several people work under you and listen to you makes her think you must be capable.

Make yourself irresistable with attractive body language

Using nonverbal body language in the right way can be a great way to pick up women. An open, confident attitude is more attractive than any clothing or hairstyle. Because no matter how you cute you are, men are judged by women regarding their attitude.

With the right nonverbal body language, you can show a woman that you find her attractive and increase your attraction to women in interactions.

What you NEVER want to do:

  • Constantly crossing your arms
  • Hold a beer or wine glass in front of your stomach
  • Constantly on your phone
  • Keeping objects on your lap
  • Looking away when talking to someone
  • Avoid eye contact

And something about your hands…

You may not be aware of it, but women like it when they see your hands.

Even the FBI interrogators always look at the hands of the person they are questioning. This is because people, albeit unconsciously, hide their hands when they have something to hide. [Read: How to start a conversation with a woman]

So NEVER put your hands in your pockets or under the table when on a date. That way you become less attractive because women subconsciously are less likely to open up to you.

Look older that you really are

No this is not a joke. In evolutionary psychology, it is also called the ‘George Clooney effect’. It has to do with the strategic advantage that women have when they date a somewhat older man.

Adult and older men are often more financially independent and emotionally stable (life experience) than young men. In addition, something else plays an important role.

While women only have a number of years to conceive in their lifetime, age plays much less on their fertility in older men.

How can you be estimated to be older than you actually are? 

A simple way to look older is to grow your beard. Some may argue that the beard trend is over, however research proves the contrary. Beard’s growth appears to be related to masculinity, dominance, and maturity for women.

 According to an Australian study from 2013, women find men with (stubble) beards the most attractive. To be even more precise: the stubble you have after roughly ten days of not shaving.

Other tips for looking older and more mature:

  • Wear shirts and watches
  • Avoid sports shoes
  • Don’t wear colorful shirts with childish texts
  • Strength training (ensures a more masculine posture)

Work on your physical appearance 

This is arguably one of the best ways to become more attractive to women.

Work on your physical!

Not only do women find a strong physically more attractive, but it also provides numerous health benefits.

By that, I don’t mean that you want to have a bodybuilder look.

It is mainly about building some muscle mass in combination with a lower fat percentage.

A 2007 study by the University of California shows that women were more likely to enter into short-term relationships with men with strong physicality.

Men who were not muscular were seen as more potential partners for a long-term relationship.

This is probably due to the ‘lover’ and ‘provider’ principle.

Attractive men are believed to have better genes and so are ideal for a woman to get pregnant with.

Unattractive men on the other hand are useful to women as providers because they help raise the child (of another man).

Stimulate her laughing muscles

Make a woman laugh and you automatically build attraction.

And this has a simple reason …

By laughing together you increase the intimacy with each other. You are stimulating her emotional brain and changing her mood instead of her logical mind. Multiple studies show that women are attracted to men they can laugh with.

For example, women in this study were involved in an experiment. A man in a bar made two men laugh, while a woman sat at the nearby table. The woman were hearing everything the men told each other.

When the joker walked up to the woman, he was three times more likely to get her number than the men who just listened to the story.

This experiment was repeated no less than 60 times.

Not much later, the women were approached by the researchers asking if they would like to go on a date with the joker.

Not only were the women more likely to give their number to the humorous man, but he was also rated higher for attractiveness and intelligence than the others.

Play her musical instruments

Still trauma from the recorder or guitar that you used to have to play in school? Then get them out of the closet because women seem to love them.

In a 2014 study, 1,500 women (with an average age of 28) were interviewed to listen to simple and complex pieces of men’s music.

And what turned out?

The women surveyed were more likely to date a man who played a musical instrument.

If you don’t have musical talent, don’t worry, just holding a guitar in your hand can help you get more dates with women.

From this experiment, it shows that men have more success in women when they know how to play music or just holding a guitar case.

The men with a guitar case turned out to get a number from a woman more often than the men who only carried a sports bag or nothing.

Tip: On dating apps such as Tinder, you will also appear to be more successful if you post photos online where you have a musical instrument in your hands.

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